I find myself these days mustering up the last bit of energy to remain positive when it feels like the negative forces are working against me. I have finally gotten back to feeling like my normal self thanks to the medication regimen that I am on. Off an on, for years, I have struggled with knee and ankle pain that would become apparent through exercise. Because I have been so focused, I would work through the pain using the mindset of "mind over matter" to get through the workouts. Over the past couple months, I would notice the pain outside of the gym and I noticed myself limping more due to pain. I finally caved in and decided to get it checked out. Turns out, I have been dealing with a torn meniscus in my knee and a split tendon in my ankle. Both of which require surgical repair and my knee has been scheduled for November 21.
Clearly, this throws a wrench into my plans to reach my goal in time for my 30th birthday. Clearly, this hasn't been my year. But I am resilient, I am a fighter and this blow hasn't been a TKO. Don't count me out just yet for I haven't shown anyone how much I want this or how much I need this. This is another opportunity for me to prove to myself what I am capable of. To bounce back, first, from knee surgery and then eventually ankle surgery. So my mindset needs to switch to I won't reach my goal...to my goal has been delayed due to unforeseen circumstances. I have been so focused on my 30th birthday (12/27) that my world came crashing down when I had to schedule surgery a month before my birthday. It sounds silly, I know, but when you have your mind fixated on something....you work hard to make sure it happens. In this case, it may not happen by that date...but it will happen, eventually.
My journey has not been smooth by any means. Between medical issues, mental hurdles and now physical limitations...this has been far from easy. I know that I should not have expected this to be easy. What is the most frustrating is how bad I want this and how my body does not cooperate. But like they say, through struggle comes great reward. I plan to demonstrate this, through whatever it takes I will prove to myself that I am worthy of reaching my goals. This can be done and it will be done.
Clearly, this throws a wrench into my plans to reach my goal in time for my 30th birthday. Clearly, this hasn't been my year. But I am resilient, I am a fighter and this blow hasn't been a TKO. Don't count me out just yet for I haven't shown anyone how much I want this or how much I need this. This is another opportunity for me to prove to myself what I am capable of. To bounce back, first, from knee surgery and then eventually ankle surgery. So my mindset needs to switch to I won't reach my goal...to my goal has been delayed due to unforeseen circumstances. I have been so focused on my 30th birthday (12/27) that my world came crashing down when I had to schedule surgery a month before my birthday. It sounds silly, I know, but when you have your mind fixated on something....you work hard to make sure it happens. In this case, it may not happen by that date...but it will happen, eventually.
My journey has not been smooth by any means. Between medical issues, mental hurdles and now physical limitations...this has been far from easy. I know that I should not have expected this to be easy. What is the most frustrating is how bad I want this and how my body does not cooperate. But like they say, through struggle comes great reward. I plan to demonstrate this, through whatever it takes I will prove to myself that I am worthy of reaching my goals. This can be done and it will be done.